GIVE A REPUBLICAN A TYPEWRITER

I've always said that if you give a monkey a typewriter, eventually it will type something coherent. This is also true of republicans. Just not as often as with monkeys.






After watching details emerge from the latest attempted terrorist attack, it got me to thinking how many freaking security agencies do we have?



We have the FBI. CIA. NSA. TSA. Army and Navy Intelligence. I could go on and on. But the question is how many of these agencies with their own bureaucracies do we need. I don't question that we need all the people gathering and interpreting intelligence. Just how many masters do they need.






I've observed politics and politicians for years. An easy reply to any and all problems they encounter is to create a committee or a commission. After the 911 Attacks, Bush created the Department of Homeland Security. This of course led to turf battles and confusion among subordinates as to who was in charge. Who's job was what. Who gets the credit or blame. The blame came in handy for several clowns because they had yet another department to blame failures on.





In this latest incident, agencies are saying they didn't know about the terrorist who tried to blow up the plane because nobody told them. President Obama said that was "unacceptable." One of the most overused words in the political spectrum. It covers much but it really is nothing more than a good word to cover one's ass when shit is hitting the fan and no reasonable excuse or explanation can be thought of.






I don't know what to do about the penchant for creating a new agency or department to handle issues that existing departments and agencies should already be handling. Perhaps we should appoint a commission to study this.

THIS THING IS F' ING GOLDEN!

A big reason I never became more than a small time political hack was my unvarnished honesty and commitment to being fair and balanced. These traits have caused many on both sides of the aisle aggravation at times. Closed minded righties hate me for honestly exposing the folly of their deluded ideas. Even open minded lefties have taken me to task at times for not being liberal enough or having righties on my link list.




That brings me to disgraced former governor Rod Blagojevich. In the anals (Yes. That's how I meant to spell it) of politics, Rod is perhaps as big a dickhead as I've ever met. My problems with this asshole are twofold. He neither cared about good government or the Democratic Party. His agenda was promoting himself and screwing anyone that didn't kiss his ass. His ego, or just arrogant stupidity caused him to say some really dumb things when you know you're probably being watched. Among these was his now infamous statement "This thing is fucking golden" when referring to his ability to appoint the next U.S. Senator from Illinois.







Senators lined up to condemn Blago for his statement. So did anyone else who could get in front of a camera. And every one of them is full of shit. Every one of them would love to have the opportunity to appoint a senator. Every one of them would have expected big things in return. That's the way it is. Politics is a slimy business. And the ones that bring home the most bacon are considered the best.




We're all pissed at Nelson and others for getting some pork put into the health care bill for their votes. Don't worry. As my right leaning friend and sometimes nemesis, Rational Nation, pointed out on the last post, both parties do it. Before it's over your legislator will have some goodies in there. Votes will be traded so it will pass one way or another. Party loyalty goes out the window if you can bring a 100 million or so to your district.






So the next time one of our legislators acts indignant at another's unscrupulous acts, tell him to shut the fuck up and get us a new bridge or something. We aren't going to elect anyone honest anyway.

DIRTY OLD REPUBLICANS SNEAK STEROIDS AND HGH FOR PENIS ENLARGEMENT INTO HEALTH CARE BILL

Those rascally old republican men are at it again. Sensing their inevitable defeat over the health insurance reform, they've taken to their old trick of putting stuff into bills that will benefit their impotent, yet still lusty constituency of old white men.




This time Viagra wasn't enough. Their old male benefactors demand bigger penises. As one lusty old republican said, "If we're going to be screwing America, we might as well do it with a big penis." All the other old white males at the Heritage Foundation agreed with that sentiment. Plus, production of HGH and steroids could be a tremendously profitable industry provided it's all done in China or India according to the U.S. Chamber of Commerce.




Sources tell us that Senator Larry Craig did object to this amendment as wasteful. "More than a mouthful is a waste" he was reported to have told his fellow lawmakers.

DIVIDE AND CONQUER

Now that the Senate has just passed it's version of health insurance reform, I need to address the many on my side that are pissed off at the compromises that had to be made to get this done.


I don't like it either. I wish they could have just rammed through either a single payer system or a Swiss Style system that TAO advocates. But it doesn't work that way.




We Democrats and Progressives do have things going our way now. The right is divided. Here in our blogging community we see many sharp right leaning members that won't describe themselves as "republicans" anymore. The rise of the tea party movement is not being filled with pissed off Democrats. It's pissed off former republicans that are filling much of it's rolls.







And just as the right is divided, and just as the right has used division to win elections and slow or stop government programs that would benefit all and not just the wealthy, we Progressives, Moderates and Libs that make up the Democratic Party must stand together and use their division to make America better.






If we stay divided on the health insurance reform bill and it gets killed, that's two huge victories for the right.




The battle to reform health care won't be won with this vote. But to lose now would set it back God knows how far. There is no Atom Bomb to drop that will achieve victory in one fell swoop. This battle for not just health insurance, but other important issues will take a long time. We have to make America an even more perfect union one fight at a time. I'd much rather have my candidates campaigning on policy victories than just holding their heads high and claiming "they fought the good fight."






The battle is for what our Nation will look like years from now. We allow ourselves to be divided and conquered, we not only lose in 2010 and 2012. But years from now our Nation will still look like it did when Bush II was in charge. Unless you're in the top two percent, that's a loss we may never get over.

HOLD YOUR NOSE AND DIG IN

There is much ado about cloture and filibusters going on now. We have to remember that Democrats have had to use the filibuster, or threat, to keep many wacko Bush appointees from becoming judges. So it ain't all bad.



It's similar to the situation we (The Good Guys) face with the health insurance reform bill. We're all pissed it doesn't have many reforms that would make it a truly great bill. And even though this may look to many of us like Congress baked us a shit pie, we're just going to have to put some Cool Whip on it and move on. As TomCat has been telling us, it's a start.

THE NEANDERTHALS NEVER EVEN HEARD OF JESUS

40,000 years ago a band of Neanderthals gave a touching burial to a crippled, old member of their group.

From what we know about them, life was short and harsh. Yet, they found it in their hearts to care for an old cripple who was of no use to the group as a whole and give him a decent burial.



Eons later a man and women who was going to soon give birth traveled to Bethlehem. Anyone could plainly see she needed a safe place to have her baby yet nobody had "room at the inn." She ended up having her baby in a stable.





2,000 years later the self proclaimed "Greatest Nation on Earth" has millions of people that still don't believe health care is a right that all our brothers and sisters deserve. They hear the words of the Dickens character Scrooge "Are there no prisons? Are there no workhouses?" And stop watching after that. That said it all for millions of arrogant, faux Christians. No need to hear anymore. Scrooge said it all right there.






The health insurance bill has some good,some bad and some ugly. But just like 2,000 years ago, the wealthy got the rooms. The poor got the shaft.




Some will say it's a start to a better system. It's about time. The system a group of Cavemen had 40,000 years ago sounded a lot more humane than Scroogian views of so many in America today.

WHO THE HELL PUT THESE ASSHOLES IN CHARGE?

Watching the political situation unfold on every level, it's pretty clear who's in charge these days. The tea baggers.




Republicans and Democrats alike are now tripping all over themselves to please these jokers by whining about spending and deficits. But the sad fact is both parties are pandering not to conscientious citizens who actually care about the size and cost of government, but to a hoard of nuts that fit Johnny Rotten's self description of "anarchist" almost to a tee.



Talk to these deluded fools at and tea party and you get the same meaningless catch phrases from each one about taxes and spending. Ask them to explain where they stand and what they want and you get blank stares or rambling bullshit at best.



As Johnny kind of said "They don't know what they want. But they know how to get it."
What they have is two political parties sucking up to them like they really have answers. The republicans must because anyone with half a brain has left their party to keep their self respect. The Democrats think they must because they are proving themselves to be spineless jellyfish. Incapable of transferring the message of hope and change to anything meaningful. Now major leaders of the Democratic Party are telling us to get whatever health care reform bill we can so we can claim victory no matter how shallow.





All that has been accomplished by their efforts is infighting among Democrats. Embarrassing hypocrisy among republicans. And government on every level now dysfunctional for fear that some asshole will make a sign in his garage to carry at the next tea party.






On CNN today Jack Cafferty asked a loaded question about government and spending because the budget had increases for Veterans benefits and law enforcement. Of course the nutjobs will scream less spending. Even though they will support every bill to spend another 100 billion on the occupations. Even though they all raised hell about Walter Reed.





A popular phrase among the right and left now is "We want our Country back." Well, I want my government back from the influence of these anarchist nutjob tea baggers.

2010: JUST VOTE AND WIPE YOUR ASS AFTERWARD

While there is no doubt about the discord among Democrats concerning some of President Obama's actions. And while republicans are gleeful about their obstruction and our anger, the real fact is that it's the republicans who are in trouble.



For all their joy at tea baggers whining about made up crap. For all their joy at defense contractors being able to further suck dollars from taxpayers because of the unending occupations, their base is in reality nothing but blind, deluded fools now.




Look at the blogs on my link list. I have several right leaning thinkers. All are gifted bloggers of conviction and rational thought. I don't think any of them describe themselves as "republican" anymore. Some say they are "independent libertarians." Or perhaps they describe themselves as true conservatives the republicans have abandoned. Both descriptions are accurate. And it does give me comfort that there are people on the right who see the republican party for what it has become. Just an obstructionist assortment of bitter old white guys and their mouthpieces.



Many on my side are worried about 2010 just as many on the right think the republicans will make a comeback. They won't. True conservative idealists will opt either for an independent or just refuse to vote. Their patriotism will compel them to cast an empty ballot. Because they vote their consciences, the right's vote will be split making Democrat victory a certainty.




So in the end, despite the failures of Obama and the Democrat controlled Congress to get us out of the two occupations and get a meaningful health insurance reform bill, they will still come out on top in 2010 and 2012 as well.



Sadly for America, it won't be because of great ideas and policy initiatives that make our Nation better and stronger. It will be because the "Party of No" is just plain screwed up.

REVEALED! CHARLES MANSON RUNNING DEPARTMENT OF RIGHT WING TALKING POINTS!

Undercover sources have confirmed a shadow agency of right wingers, founded by Dick Cheney has been charged with inventing new right wing talking points. The words "kill, killer, slash, death, pain, suffering, misery, terrorist, al queda, hate, deficit" and other scary terms must be included on all right wing memos and releases.



Cheney has appointed Charles Manson as chief of the Department of Right Wing Talking Points. Cheney said "Charlie is the only man we can trust with the important mission of lying and scaring the shit out of our fellow Americans. If he could delude a bunch of people into having sex with him and murdering for him, imagine what he could delude America into believing."

FATCAT BANKERS TO GET THEIR COMEUPPANCE FROM PRESIDENT OBAMA!

President Obama is getting ready to tell those greedy, evil fatcat bankers a thing or two today. I only wish I were a fly on the wall so I could listen to him tell those bastards who's in charge. Just like he told the republicans to take a flying leap. We won't let those obstructionist pricks hold up national health care!

Just like he told off General McChrystal for going public with his plans to increase Troop levels in Afghanistan before asking the Commander in Chief. That's the way Mr. President. You showed that insubordinate chump who was boss. Only gave him 3/4 of what he wanted. My Granddaughter is crying. I think I'll give her 3/4 of a bottle to show her who the boss is.



One of my favorite scenes from the great movie "Shaft" was when one of Bumpy's thugs told Shaft that they were gonna tangle. Shaft said "You ain't gonna do shit."

It's past time for President Obama to stop acting like Bumpy's thug and start acting like Shaft. I want my President to be a "Baaaaaadddd, mother fu###$%R"!

BUD: THE REPUBLICAN JESUS

I told myself last year I wouldn't blog about local stuff but this is a special occasion.



The republicans en masse voted against Wall Street regulations that would save our Nation from another financial meltdown. And the inspiration for this action was none other than my old friend and local republican hero, Melvin "Bud" Niekamp.




Bud has been on our local School Board and County Board twenty years or so. And although he does have a good grasp of issues and can speak with authority, when it's time for a vote, Bud votes "no."




This has worked well for Bud because he's always the leading vote getter in every election despite the fact that he has never offered any alternatives to whatever he votes "no."





We have several on our County Board and two city aldermen that have adopted Bud's philosophy. And now, as a matter of local pride, it's cool to see Congressional republicans following Bud's lead. Offer nothing but a no vote.





There are those that have called my hometown of Quincy Illinois "Forgottonia." That is changing. Republicans everywhere are hearing the Word of Bud. And that Word is "No."




Good job Bud. It's about time you got the credit you deserved.

WHAT THE HELL?

Religious zealots are all over the news lately. For the most part they are full of shit as far as I'm concerned.



While I can respect a good knowledge of The Bible, one must also understand that since the time It's Books were written, or orally handed down, the stories have been told and retold millions of times. Who really knows what actually is God's Word and what are merely the words of some misogynist asshole with slaves?




I have no problem with God. And if Reverend Warren thinks I'm going to hell because I don't worship in his church. Or that I'm not a good Christian because I think Ugandans wanting to put Gays to death for being gay is despicable, and I will not be reticent in saying so like Reverend Warren is, then... Hell. I don't care what he or any other self righteous dickhead says.





That being said, many on the non religious side need to lighten up. There will always be some idiot that thinks posting a picture or statue of The Ten Commandments will make us better or get them a ticket to Heaven. A Christmas tree can either be a symbol of the season or just a tree made to look pretty with lights and stuff.

I'm not offended by a Menorah or a Mosque. If we can all support and encourage others to share their beliefs and cultures, who doesn't appreciate Native American culture? How many cities have districts dedicated to ethnic heritage. Could be a German Village. French Quarter. Nobody is asking you to convert to Chinese when you visit Chinatown. If some judgemental moron wants to think you're going to hell because you don't show proper reverence to his Cross or other display, he's the one with the problem. Relax. If God had meant for life to not be a pain in the ass sometimes, he would have smited these self righteous assholes long ago.

A WOMAN FOR ALL SEASONS

Although many are tired of flogging the dead horse known as Sarah Palin, her story tells a tale of Americana.











It's not about heroism or greatness. It's about people's need for heroes. There's no doubt this woman is of limited intellectual capacity. Yet she has been elevated to an almost "Joan of Arc" status by many desperate for a modern day right wing hero. These deluded fools have created an image of the down to earth, common sense loving American Mom that will save us all from pinkos like Truth 101.










None of them can come up with a real reason or substantial position Palin has on any issue. They just say "she's real." Or "she's one of us." I guess the one of us means she's an idiot living in a fantasy world of Sunday family picnics and boys and girls saving themselves for marriage. Just like them.










Many of the people that were deified by the hero worship culture were very humble. Eisenhower and Omar Bradley were just two guys doing their jobs. Even Reagan seemed to understand it was all an act on his part. But Sarah Palin has embraced her status as right wing hero and savior. And her ego is leading to jealous hatred among the right. Dan Quayle asks "why her and not me?" The picture at the top should make that answer obvious.







But that's another dirty little republican secret. Look good. Say what the Cheney Cabal tells you to say and wear a dress. While you and abortion are distracting the idiots that want to screw you, we'll keep screwing America.

JUST EXACTLY WHEN WAS OUR NATION "INNOCENT"?

You can't watch the History Channel or listen to some do gooder without hearing the phrase "loss of innocence."

Just when exactly were we or anyone else "innocent"?

Our Nation lost it's innocence in every war it ever fought. The Kaiser took our innocence. Hitler took it. The Gay Nineties was a fun time for many but it also entailed a loss of innocence. The World's Fair that introduced A1 Steak Sauce, Hot Dogs and ice cream proved another innocence losing affair.

Some real robbers of innocence include Hitler, Hirohito and Manson. But it also was robbed by mundane things like game show scandals. Ooohh! They gave a guy the answers to the $64,000 question and our Nation was rocked and lost it's innocence. Big freaking deal.

Gay marriage and Tiger Woods (There's a shock. A young male celebrity having sex with multiple women. Who would have thought?) are hot innocence stealing topics today. One would think the moralists on the right would at least give grudging praise to Tiger for choosing to have sex with females but in their cloistered world sex doesn't exist. Look to their ignoring of John Ensign and his peccadillo's.

At least once a week some concerned parent complains about a school board decision and that it will rob children of their innocence.

Life has taught me that innocence ain't all it's cracked up to be. It's over rated. But it does give people that want to complain but can't think of why they're complaining a topic. It reminds me of when I started blogging. One of the first trolls that left a comment complained that I was foul mouthed and of perverted logic and morals. My presence on the web cost it it's "innocence."

THESE REPUBLICANS COULD SELL CRAP TO AN AVON LADY

Having spent half of my working life as a commission salesperson, I can appreciate the sales ability of the republicans.

The republican agenda benefits perhaps two percent of America. Yet millions of people vote against their own interests because some guy with a radio show convinced them that tax cuts for the wealthiest is good for them. That trillions in debt will "starve the beast" and lead to freedom. These morons then complain to anyone with a microphone that their freedom is being suppressed while they're freely assembling on public property during a tea party.

The latest rehash of republican chicanery and salesmanship is the estate tax. Or as the chief jive turkey republicans call it, the "death tax."

Republican senators have been decrying this as a tax on the dead. The idiots that bought into their tea party crap are buying this nonsense hook, line and sinker also. If the dead guy was so worried about his heirs then he would have estate planning, trusts and life insurance plans in place. If not then he probably thinks the people that want his money are unworthy idiots. Or he is just an asshole.

No doubt, there is an idiot like Joe the faux plumber someplace waiting to tell another idiot with a microphone that he doesn't want to inherit anything because the government will tax it away from him. Even though at least 98% of us will never have to deal with estate taxes because the estate has to be worth at least 3.5 million dollars.

In case any righties are reading, please think about this. None of you are worth 3.5 million dollars. You are once again being duped into supporting policies that only benefit the most privileged among us. And not even the people that worked for the money but those that would get it not because of their hard work. But because the hardest work they ever did was when half their chromosomes were in a sperm that was the fastest and luckiest sperm to the egg. And for that the republicans have millions of deluded, tea bagging fools that the luckiest sperm deserves millions tax free.

HAVE WIT AND WISDOM. WILL TRAVEL

All the topics of interest this weekend seem to have been covered by the outstanding bloggers on my link list. I have left comments worthy of Lord Byron and Oscar Wilde on them for your education and pleasure my friends. Please visit these blogs and may God bless America.

REPUBLICANS LIKE THEIR SURGES LARGE AND LONG

Normally I find double entendres irritating but this latest republican one I have to admit is quite clever.






For two years republicans talked of a "surge". They got it in Iraq and shouted in orgasmic glee. Senator John Ensign has an affair and they all give him high fives for his "man surge" directed at his aides wife. "Give a surge for Ronald Reagan" they said. Ensign said he gave her all the "supply side" she could handle.





Yet, for all their love of surging, they complain about Obama's Afghanistan surge. Their biggest complaint is it's not LARGE ENOUGH OR LONG ENOUGH.





Get it now folks?




Those dirty republican perverts!

GENERALLY SPEAKING, JOHN McCAIN IS AN IDIOT

I made the comment in the previous post taking issue with our current crop of generals. In both Iraq and Afghanistan, each time a commander was changed he was gushed all over as the next "Patton" or something. Eight years of occupation with no progress, and don't tell me 75 civilian deaths instead of the usual 98 a month is progress, should be enough time to tell us these generals are at best a mediocre crop of buffoons in cool uniforms.




A good general will trade lives for land and victory. What the generals and the two idiots giving them orders for eight years, Bush and Cheney, did was trade lives for time. They were hoping that by just sacrificing the lives of our fine Soldiers that perhaps terrorists and insurgents would get tired and go away. Of course in their ignorance, they just kept creating more terrorists and insurgents. But their lives for time strategy also benefited Halliburton and other defense contractors so perhaps there was a method to their madness.






John McCain is also an idiot. To argue against a time limit shows him to be the sheltered and blind fool he is to his life and the right wing.





The time limit President Obama gave the Afghans last night sends them the right message. There is nothing wrong with telling a deadbeat to get his shit together. To do so without a deadline makes it meaningless. All McCain's way of thinking would mean to Karzai and his band of merry clowns is that in a a few months they will be told to get their shit together. In the meantime more terrorists and insurgents will be created and we will look weak, stupid and dishonest for propping up scumbags.







President Obama aid out the plan he had to lay out in order to keep a campaign promise. I'd much rather he give the order and bring our Troops home today. But we can't always get what we want. And President Obama also showed us that he will do what he thinks is right and not be afraid to stand before America and tell us why. Thank you Mr. President.

PRISONER OF PROMISES

Most of my left leaning blogging friends are angry over President Obama's decision to send 30 thousand more Troops to Afghanistan. I don't like it either.

There lies the rub. A main talking point of President Obama's campaign was getting out of Iraq, which I wish he would hurry up and do, and putting the focus on Afghanistan.

My first thought about this was that it was a cowardly pander to the republicans. Just as far too many Democrats caved during the lead up to the Iraq invasion. None of them wanted to be branded as "soft on terror." Perhaps President Obama didn't want to have the same label.

But the more I thought about it today, it is a bold decision politically because this is pleasing to a group that isn't going to vote for him no matter what he does. And his supporters during the election stand a good chance of abandoning him in 2012 if this doesn't work quickly.

Strategically, I disagree with this decision. I don't have much faith in the generals since 2003.

But Obama is keeping his word to put the focus on Afghanistan. That in itself is refreshing. That a President is keeping his word. Please remember this in 2012 my left leaning Brothers and Sisters. We've seen the alternatives the republicans offer.